Helping your Friend? Part 2: Backstabbing

Welcome to part 2 of my mini-series on ‘Helping your Friend?’. First, a quick commercial break.

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Now that the little advertisement is over, I would like to continue with the post. This second part will be talking about telling on your friend. As promised, this is the second ‘suggested’ topic from a post awhile back on friendship. And once more, it’s going to be a little controversial, though not as touchy as the post before this.

So, what’s this post going to be about? The answer is *drumrolls*

Telling on your friend. Otherwise known as backstabbing.

No one likes to be backstabbed. Don’t tell me you know someone who enjoys being stabbed in the back on a regular basis. Maybe you do, but I don’t really care since this post isn’t about the people who love being backstabbed (those people aren’t even human; have they no emotion nor sense of self-pride?), it’s about normal people, people who hate that feeling of being ‘betrayed’, and of course, the perpetrators. Let’s get things running, shall we? I’d like to begin things with a short recount (don’t expect things to be so detailed; I’m not writing a composition!).

Once upon a time, Mark was playing soccer in his classroom. A few other friends were also playing soccer with him. Naturally, if you were to play soccer in class, you are bound to hit things, right? Not very surprising, that’s what happened to our poor old protagonist. Mark accidentally kicked the ball at the notice board at the back of the classroom.

Of course, something even worse had to happen. Poor old Mark, ever so unlucky; the ball rebounded off the notice board, ricocheted off the open back door, and bounced into the corridor outside the classroom. Right at that very moment, a teacher, Mr Stone, had to walk past. Picking up the ball, Mr Stone walked into the classroom. “Does this ball belong to any of you? I found it in the corridor.” (note: Mr Stone had not seen what had happened just now; he had no knowledge of the incident whatsoever), Mr Stone asked the people in class.

“Yes, yes it’s mine. Thank you Mr Stone!” Mark said, slightly nervous; if Mr Stone knew he had been playing soccer in class, he was so screwed. But, Mr Stone didn’t know. Smile on his face, he returned the ball to Mark. As soon as he did that, Mr Stone asked Mark, “Mark, may I know how your ball ended up in the corridor anyway?” Mark replied, “Oh Mr Stone, how unfortunate I was; I accidentally dropped my ball when I was about to leave the classroom and it rolled into the corridor.” However, before Mr Stone could say anything, Damian spoke up.

“Mr Stone, Mark’s lying! He was playing soccer in the classroom; I saw him with my very own eyes!” said Damian.

“Mark, is what Damian is saying true?” asked Mr Stone, voiced tinged with suspicion.

“Umm, I, errr, I—I –“ Mark stuttered, too afraid to say anything coherent. He knew the consequences of being caught for playing soccer in class, a punishable offence. But before Mark could finished his sentence, Damian interrupted, repeating his claim, “Mark was really playing; Joshua and Eugene were also playing with him!”

To cut the long story short, Mark, Joshua and Eugene ended up with a whole bunch of demerit points. All because of Damian who wouldn’t shut up.

This is a classic example of a backstabber. These kind of people have questionable motives; some want to sabotage their classmates, while others just can’t keep their mouth closed. Why these people are like that, I do not know. I do know, however, that this can be very irritating.

Beforehand, I must emphasise, schools do play a part to breed this kind of mentality. Sounds controversial, doesn’t it? But it is true, although only somewhat, that schools encourage people to have this kind of twisted mentality. It isn’t really the fault of the school; pressure is main culprit here. Unfortunately, schools are an immense source of pressure for many students; they feel a need for competing with their fellow classmates, which leads them to commit such acts, to give them an edge over their classmates, to gain the favour of their teachers, who will favour them more than their classmates guilty of offences. What’s more, schools encourage students to tell on their classmates who do wrong. This is not wrong, but people do have to draw the line somewhere. I would say a good line to draw would be more serious offences like spray-painting parts of the school illegally and the like.

However, sometimes, such as the above situation, telling on others is not smled upon, at least not by other classmates. You think you’re helping them, and the school only spreads ‘propaganda’ to the students to tell them that telling on someone who is doing something wrong is good (think of the numerous times which teachers have said that ignoring someone who is doing something wrong is not right), you think that by being ‘extra’, that they learn from their mistakes. The truth is, you are merely sabotaging yourself. Yes, you will be hurting other people, but ultimately, the person who will be hurt the most is the yourself, the person who told on your classmates. Where’s your sense of class spirit? True class spirit is what the school tells you is the courage to report your ‘friends’ doing wrong things, but in fact I would say that it is helping your classmates. You would never appreciate a classmate who got you into trouble, now would you? Damian could have just kept his mouth shut, which he didn’t. If he had not said anything to Mr Stone, nothing would have happened to Mark and his friends.

Here’s something I found. It’s by a disgruntled student who was backstabbed by his classmate. As I don’t ever want to be a backstabber, I am not going to reveal who wrote this. But here it is anyway; a prime example of what someone who has been backstabbed would feel.

I hate back-stabbers; if you aren't willing to help your classmates, shut up. If not, get the hell out of the class. I'm sure there are people who love you being a dog. No one wants you. No one. Maybe SOME of your 'friends' do. But no one gives a damn about them as well. At least they're better than you. They wouldn't tell on their classmates. You have absolutely no class sprit at all. If it were legal, you'd probably be in many pieces by now. Impaled, burnt, decapitated. You're just a lousy, unwanted, boot-licking suck-up. That's all you are and ever will be. Have fun with your life. If you even have one. Since you live in a cage in the staff room. Go on, lick that shoe. Lick it, dog. Polish it with your tongue. And hurry, I don't have all day.

Want to know what happens to those people who backstab others? Most of the time, they are hated. They couldn’t just keep quiet and not tell on their classmates, could they. They HAD to say something. Seriously, don’t you find that exceedingly annoying? I know I do. If you don’t have anything to say to protect your classmates, then don’t say anything at all at the very least. Just don’t be ‘extra’ and tell on your classmates, getting them into trouble. You certainly wouldn’t enjoy it if the same thing happened to you.